hmmmmm...

So we were late getting there but we still got right to the front gap at the side of the bars (:
The Maine are actually pretty good, I hadnt heard of them before last night but Im deffo going to be buying that off itunes now (Y)
So The Maine went off after me and dannii heard like 2 songs and We The Kings(L) came on : D
I now love them even more than I did. Cant remember all te songs they played except for Skyway avenue, Check Yes Juilette and a cover of The Gorillaz Feel Good Inc (: Ahha I LOVE THEMMM (:
OOhhhh yess beckett and chizz I see you both lurking at the side of the stage where you think nobody can see you  >.<

Muwahaha (: They kept looking over at me and dannii cus we were the only ones that noticed them.
SOOO.... then all the dudes came on to set up and I looked to the side of the stage and saw a door <.<   >.>
And you could see Mike, Chizz, and sometimes Butcher, Adam and Beckett (: Butcher came on to soundcheck then the rest of the band came onnnn : D
BKSFSDFOINWDJFGB We were so close to them : DDD During slow down William looked directly at me and dannii and was like singing to us Loll. Then he walked past the barrier and seeing as there was nothing infront of me and dannii we grabbed his arm Lmaoo (:
They are actually amazing I now love them even more (:
Picturesss...





















Afterwards we went outside to go wait by the buses but we only had an hour so we went round the corner and there were loads of people there so me and dannii went to hide behind the bus next to the door, but nobody came ):
But... WE MET DANNYY : D he was cooool(H)


We talked about accents, I broke my shoe and he told me I needed to buy some new shoes, talked about how small I am and how I had to stand on my toes and he had to bend down so we were round about the same height for a photo : and talked about how if you have a scottish accent six sounds like sex :L 
Then my mom came so we hid behind him LMAOO (L)


I LOVE MY DANNII WE ARE TRANNY HOOKERS (;


 

View Raw Image' src="http://s1.tinypic.com/2ryk5tw.jpg" width=250>

This made me lol really loud.
But I cant figure out who else is in it?
Any help????

Fuck the school.
If I want pink in my hair then pink in my hair I shall have.
Thank god my moms a hairdresser (:

The begining.
(I took the diary part from a journal i wrote earlier today.)

I feel as though i need to open up more. I keep everything bottled up inside of me. I show my emotions but not as deep as the truley are. There are problems in my life that even my closest friends are oblivious to even though its happening right infront of them. I feel like i am in a dark corner, surrounded with all of these problems. And to tell you the truth I dont know what to do.

There is that one special boy. He doent know it but he has my heart. But to him im just some depressed girl who has problems in her life who uses him to confide in. But he doesnt see me in the same way i see him. This makes me want to give up all hope on love right now. But then again if i give up on love what chance do i have in the near future?

I need help but I feel that if i tell somebody hey could tell the people around me which would cause even more trouble. I need someone to talk to, someone who understands if you get what im saying? I am utterly confused with my life right now. It seems as tho there is no point to my life which also makes me want to give up. And there is nobody here to tell me that it will all turn out alright. That again links to the whole giving up thing again.

My diary. The only place where I know my secrets are safe, the only place I can show my true emotions. My name is Amie Louisa Lewis, soon to be 19. I have nobody, my mother walked out on me when i was born, the less said about her the better. My father, well hes always away on bussiness as he likes to call it. So Im left to look after myself most of the time. But then theres my older brother. The aggresive,drug addict.

I trust one person with my life. I know he would do anything to make sure I was okay, cus thats just how he is. Hes the one person that cares about me. The one person I can tell almost anything to. Almost anything. To tell you the truth I had fallen for him. From the first time he asked me if I was okay when I had just found out that m father had been in a car crash right up until this very moment. With every day I fell for him more and more. And now, well I guess Im in love and I cant do anything about it. I cant stop it, not that I want to anyway. He is just perfect from his looks to his personality. But I had no chance. He was the one that is always there to comfort me in my darkest hours. But he doesnt feel the same way that i feel about him.

There are many problems and complications in my life. Too many. I only tell him half of whats wrong. I daren't tell him the othe half of my troubles. No. I can't. He'll tell somebody which will cause more trouble. More problems and complications for me. And to be honest Ive already got more than I can deal with.

My brother is a drug addict. Not a day goes by when he isnt smoking something. And the drugs show a different side him. A brutal, uncaring side. The violent side. He'd abuse me, threaten me with the sharp kitchen knives, throw punches at me as though i was a punch bag. And I couldnt do anything about it.

Im not sure wether to contiue? comments would be appreciated (:

Being away from the people who are closest to my heart only makes me miss them more. sometimes like they say distance makes the heart grow fonder. well i guess thats true in my case.

I felt as though i was drifting away from my friends and towards another group of people whom now i concider eaqually good friends to me but i never even knew them before. But being away from the people whom i trust and know made me realise that i have some of the best friends ever. Now i feel like i am back with those who i know i can trust with my life. But then again from this experience ive gained more people whom i know i can trust.

I feel as though i need to open up more. I keep everything bottled up inside of me. I show my emotions but not as deep as the truley are. There are problems in my life that even my parents are oblivious to even though its happening right infront of them. Some of the time they are the cause of it. Sometimes its things that one certain person does or says. Ive tried to sort it out but nothing has happened. That made me feel even more iscolated. I feel like i am in a dark corner, surrounded with all of these problems. And to tell you the truth I dont know what to do.

There is that one special boy. He doent know it but he has my heart. But to him i seem like nothing, like i am invisible. This makes me want to give up all hope on love right now. But then again if i give up on love what chance do i have in the near future?

I need help but I feel like i cant confide in anybody as they could tell the people around me which would cause even more trouble. I need someone to talk to, someone who understands if you get what im saying? I am utterly confused with my life right now. It seems as tho there is no point to my life which also makes me want to give up. And there is nobody here to tell me that it will all turn out alright. That again links to the whole giving up thing again. I have spilled most of my most deepest thoughts and secrets here but i need to talk to someone. Before i give up.

I might write a bit more later but for the time this is all i can handle I dont want to break myself.

should I start writing again? If so i need ideas.

And for once in my life I an happy (:

Right well ive been up all night and i was just going through my old journals cus im shit bored. Please can someone invent a time machine so i can murder whoever thought of SATs ohh and while im at it can i murder Shakespeare? Ohh well at least i get today off (: But then agin maths test tomorrow first thing :

Time 4:39am

Fact of the day

Noel Fielding total fittness(:  Look him up.

Watching

The mighty boosh biatch watch it (:

Ahhh Pretty. Odd. My sisters such a freak she was up at 5am to get it off iTunes and shes abnormally small. She should join a circus (:

God Golly Gosh fantas going to my head. By tomorrow I will not remember tonight. Wait, it is tomorrow. :/

Like the best night everr. Even tho we queued for half an hour it was worth it.

An I saw my siannybabesss for the first time in 7 years (: I was a happy bunny.

So we got in an NFG were playing then they went an Paramore came on (:

It was mad. An I got VERY wet. Any who, best night everr.

Well thats until March 9th Panic babess(:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHatwUNh4Uc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9a29zvsNXTI

The white walls were closing in on me. Nurses ran past me into the room in which someone was dying all becase of me.

If only I hadn't been so self centered and... abusive this wouldn't of happened. If only I could turn back time.

The sight I saw still lingers in my head tourturing me. The words echo in my head. The body lying in a pool of blood in the kitchen dead, haunts me.

More nurses run past me along with a doctor. Thats when I realise somethong is wrong. Looking through the door I can see the body. Somebody comes out to tell me that Ryan didn't make it and that they did everything they could.

The house seems empty, like me. I feel like my soul has been taken from me. I sit on the bed, lonley and feeling guilty. I can't walk into the kitchen without tears rolling down my cheeks. The sight still haunts me, I can't sleep, not without seeing his body. I wished I had listened more to him. Why am I so arrogant. That night he had confessed everything, his deepest most darkest secrets. How he felt about me. And I just laughed and told him not to be so stupid. Why did I do that, maybe I just couldn't admit how I felt the same way about him. Now there is no way of telling him how I fell. He told me everything and I laughed at him. I told him I was going out and when I got back we would forget everything that he said. He let a few tears roll down his cheeks before walking off. I followed him an told him not to be so stupid. He turned to face me and said so quietly I could barely hear it "Im not being stupid. Its how I feel. But now I regret ever telling you Brendon." I got mad and hit him. He let more tears roll down his cheeks. I told him to stop crying and to sort himself out. He walked away and locked himself in the bathroom. I shouted to him through the door that I was going out. I never heard him say to me "I love you. And I'm sorry."

But it's too late now. I walked to the bathroom to the glass cupboard and took out a jar.

2 days later a body was found. He had overdosed and died. A note was found next to him.

Ryan I'm sorry. But now we can be together forever.

T'is short I know. And probably not very good. Comments pleasee. Tar. X

It really does. Like I've been told; Life's a bitch and then you die.

Natalies Pov

I said bye to Maddii and unlocked the door. Not knowing that there was someone sat there watching me. "Hey" the person said from the darkness. I knew exactly who it was. The person who took my heart and shattered it into a thousand peices. Ryan. "Get out!" I said trying not to show him how much he had messed me up. "Please Natalie. I need you. I love you. It's like a piece of me is missing. I want you back." he held onto my arms but I just brushed them off. "You don't know how much you messed me up Ryan. Just leave." I sighed and opened the door for him. "Fine I'll go. But I wont give up." he said walking out. I closed the door, went to my room, lay on the bed and let tears run down my cheeks.

Maddiis pov

I walked into the bedroom to see a familiar figure lying in the bed. "Hey babe" they whispered as I crawled in next to him. "I love you Will." I said whilst being pulled into a hug. Will slipped his arms around my waist and we both fell asleep. The next morning I woke up to fnd the bed empty apart from me. I could smell someting cooking downstairs and t smelt good. I got up, put on some skinnys and a top and went downstairs.

Signes Pov

Pete walked in. Drunk. Again. He stumbled towards me and kissed my cheek. "I love you" he said whilst kissing down my neck. I pushed him away and got up. "Pete I'm sick of this. Almost every night you go out and get drunk. You come back and expect me to... Well you know what I mean." I said walking out of the room and up to bed. "Baby please don't be like this with me. I love you. And your so god damn hot when your mad." he said following me upstairs. He came into bed with me and pulled me close to him. I put my head on his chest and he kissed the top of my head. "I love you too Pete." I whispered closing my eyes.

I know it's not long but I'm not sure if I should continue it?  Comment please and I need more people! 

has lyk anyone got bebo? i'm havin a race wiv a fwend 2 c hu can get the most in a week. If you hav please help me by adding me at http://www.bebo.com/xmaddy-----x fankies

LUFFAGE X

RECAP

You know what. I love you Lace. I said looking
down at her.
Awwww I love you too Ry. She replied crawling up
so our heads were touching.
We both lent in and our lips met.

2 weeks later

Laceys pov

HEY PETE!!! I screamed as the door opened

Dude chill it's only me. Ryan shouted back

But I'm here aswell. Pete said walking through the doorway

Nice place Lace. But I still cant beleive you left me.

I couldn't help it Mom made me. I argued back

And where is she?

Meeting in New York. She won't be back for like ages so i guess you guys can crash here if you want

Has everybody forgot about me! Ryan shouted from the kitchen

Nah how could I ever forget 'bout you babe?

Right well I'm off to go do the sound check wanna come?

YAY! I shouted

Kay Ry you wanna come with?

Sure. Ry said walking into the hallway

Oh ye Pete you have got to hear these guys play their amazing!

Cool well if you all come down to the venue I'll listen to you play.

Cool.

At the venue

Heyar Patrick!

God what time is it? He asked waking up

SUMMER TIME!

Oh haha. Very funny. He said sarcastically

Now seriously what time is it?

About three in the afternoon

Great well I guess the guys are waiting for me. He said putting his hat on

Yep. Lolage.

And with that Patrick walked out of the room

Hey babe. Ryan said wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my cheek.

Hey. So you all ready for tonight?

Yep I can't beleive we're actually playing tonight

Petes Pov

I was walking to the stage from our dressing room when a very pretty girl walked past smiling at me. I carried on walking backwards looking at her. It was as tho she had a shining light around her. When suddenly I tripped over someones foot.

HAHA! You fell over!!!! Lacey laughed.

Biatch! I shouted chasing her into our dressing room. When I finally pinned her down to the floor I asked if she knew who that girl who walked past me was.

Yep she's brendons girlfriend.

Oh.

Dare I ask why?

No.

Okay well I'm going to make myself useful AS SOON AS YOU LET ME GO!

Oh ye sorry. I said standing up. Can I ask what her name is?

Ye it's Amii

Cool.

Well see you later. Lace called walking out the door

I looked around and saw that she'd left her phone on the table. I picked it up and searched through the phone book untill I found it. I copied the number into my phone and placed Laceys phone down on the table where she'd left it.

I went outside and started writing a text. It went along the lines of

Meet me in the tour bus in 5 mins X.

I entered the number and sent it.

FF 5 MINS LATER IN TOUR BUS. still petes pov

I sat and waited until the door opened and she walked in.

Hey you must be Amii

Erm... yes how do you know my name.

I just know these things

Rite. Well. So what did you want me for?

Oh just wondered if you wanted a drink with me.

I don't drink

I wont tell anyone you're underage

It's not that.

Well what is it then?

My dad was an alchoholic(spelling?). He abused my mom and 3 months ago she died in a carcrash.

Oh I'm really sorry. I said looking down at my hands

No you're not. Everyone just says that to make me feel beter.

Well I'm really sorry honest. I moved further up the sofa making room so that Amii could sit down.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT SORRY IT'S BEEN SOOOO LONG STUPID COMPUTOR AND INETNET BUT NOW I AM BACK ONLINE! YAY MORE COMING SOON!

COMMENTS PWEASE!

LUFFAGE X